Give cynical and overly harsh joke reviews of upcoming games!

[Legend]

The Order.

More like the Snorer. The game may look good, but everything else is non existent. 9/10s of my play through I was watching a movie. To try and stop "players" from noticing this, they've put in button prompts every few minutes so that you can't let go of the controller.

The gun play is what we are used to in gears of war, except all the fun has been removed. Controls are bad and shooting only lasts a minute or two before the next cutscene starts.

Story wise, it's worse than a fan made TV show. Sir gallahand is flat and 2D. He thinks he's always right and goes against anyone disagreeing with him. Instead of dealing with the complex emotions of one's self discovering their destructive nature, the writers pull a dues ex machina and make Gallahand save the day.


If you condensed the game in to a half hour tv show, I'd recommend watching. As a game though, it's not worth anyone's time. 2/10